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Review of Im Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter

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Book Review

I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L. Sánchez has been reviewed by Focus on the Family unit'south marriage and parenting magazine.

Plot Summary

Julia Reyes is a 15-year-old daughter of Mexican immigrants. Her 22-twelvemonth-old sis, Olga, was recently hitting by a double-decker and killed. Julia'southward mother, Amá, is a housecleaner. Her father, Apá, is a worker at a candy factory. They have e'er been over-protective of her. Amá gives Julia fifty-fifty less freedom now that her sister is gone.

Everyone believed Olga was the perfect daughter, one who attended church and community college classes, had no social life and never shamed the family unit. But when Julia discovers skimpy underwear, a hotel key and love notes in Olga's room, she wonders what secrets her sis was keeping.

Julia is rarely allowed to go out the house subsequently Olga's death. When she does, she frequently parties with her friend, Lorena. While Julia wasn't close to her sis, she however feels a deep sense of grief and loss. She launches her ain covert investigation, trying to determine whether Olga's friend Angie or any of her other acquaintances knew anything about a secret boyfriend or girlfriend.

Julia deals with other life changes during this fourth dimension likewise. Lorena has become all-time friends with a flamboyantly gay immature human who calls himself Juanga. They potable, party and do drugs to a level that makes Julia feel uncomfortable. Regretting that she never gave Olga a quinceañera, Amá decides to spend thousands of dollars they don't accept to throw one for Julia.

Julia is almost 16 and dreads the whole thing. Julia meets a rich white boy named Connor in a bookstore and, when Julia tin get out of the business firm, they begin spending fourth dimension together. Julia is anxious to leave Chicago and her parents' apartment when she graduates. She loves writing and reading, and her English instructor helps her apply to colleges.

Julia becomes increasingly depressed and emotional every bit her mother removes even more of her freedoms. She cries frequently to Connor on the telephone. Frustrated, he tells her he doesn't know how to assist her. She takes Connor'due south comments as a proffer that they should intermission upwards.

Julia wakes up in the hospital, remembering how she slit her wrists the dark before. She is diagnosed with astringent anxiety and low. In addition to medication, she will attend regular counseling sessions and spend a week in an outpatient group therapy setting.

Once her outpatient treatment is complete, her parents send her to visit relatives in United mexican states. She's initially unhappy with the arrangement, only she soon realizes the modify in surroundings is expert for her. Just earlier leaving for Mexico, she discovers Olga's internet password and reads messages between Olga and her lover. She learns Olga's young man was a married doctor who kept promising to leave his married woman.

The slower step of life in Mexico with relatives energizes Julia. She fifty-fifty has a short-term romance with a boy she meets there. Her grandmother shares a dark secret: Amá was raped every bit she was crossing the boarder from Mexico into the United States. This realization helps Julia develop more sympathy toward her mother.

When Julia returns to Chicago, she's determined to be more understanding of Amá. She reconnects with Connor and tells him where she's been and what's happened, a niggling at a time. She learns Olga was meaning when she died, and she tracks down the boyfriend. He cries and says he really did love Olga. He and his married woman are at present divorced. He gives Olga's ultrasound motion-picture show to Julia.

Julia's depression improves with counseling and medication. She and Connor spend time together again. Her relationship with her parents improves, and she develops a friendship with Juanga. She's most excited when she gets a total scholarship to a higher in New York.

Christian Behavior

Julia's mother is Catholic and attends prayer meetings at her church. Julia says Amá thinks anybody is a Satanist. She and her mother frequently argue nearly faith because Julia feels the Catholic church hates women and wants them to be weak and ignorant.

Julia calls faith in Jesus a sack of crap. She comments on her mother's cheap religious décor. A woman on the street tells Julia that Jesus loves her, only Julia says He doesn't.

She speaks near God to an old man who helps her considering she says information technology's of import to audio religious when talking to sometime people. Julia says she's trying to be a better girl when she returns from Mexico and so she attends a prayer meeting with Amá.

A adult female at that place prays and says she hopes people will detect the honey and understanding they're seeking because God lives in each of them. Julia gets into an argument with a homo at the meeting who is concerned nigh his son'due south homosexuality. Julia is aroused because she doesn't understand why the man feels he needs to forgive his son. She angrily tells him Jesus preached we should dear everyone.

Other Belief Systems

Lorena'south mom worships various saints, including a skeleton saint named Santa Muerte. She dresses information technology and leaves sacrificial items for it. Julia's aunt in Mexico does a ritual cleaning on Julia, putting crosses and egg on her body. Julia says after death at that place is just the transfer of energy and a return to dirt.

Authority Roles

Amá has experienced pregnant hurting and loss in her life. She keeps a tight rein on Julia, causing the daughter to feel suffocated. Apá works long hours and has given up things he loves, such as painting, in order to back up his family. Julia's teacher mentors her and helps her with college applications, telling her she's 1 of the most gifted students he's ever had.

Profanity & Violence

The Lord's name is used in vain frequently. Words including the f-word, a–, southward—, balls, p—, crap, d–n, b–ch, sucks, h—, whore, screw and douche appear regularly.

Julia talks well-nigh how her sister'due south torso was non just striking, merely smashed, by a semi. The volume includes a graphic description of Julia's relatives in Mexico slaughtering a pig.

Sexual Content

Julia mentions her large boobs often and talks about how men stare at them. Lorena says Julia dresses similar a homeless lesbian.

I of Julia's uncles sometimes sticks his finger in her mouth when no one is looking. He tries it when she's 15, and she bites his finger until it bleeds. She wonders how another of her uncles has sex with his wife considering she'southward so fatty. She mentions how she hopes she never has to hear her parents having sexual activity.

Julia gets her first kiss from a friend of Lorena'south swain. Juanga is shocked to learn that Julia is a 15-twelvemonth-old virgin. Julia and Connor osculation, and she begins to wonder how she'll know when she's ready for sex. She asks Lorena for advice. Lorena tells her she needs to shave her p—y before she goes to Connor'south business firm.

Julia also stops for condoms on the way, just in instance he doesn't have them. The book provides some item about their sexual run into. Julia feels embarrassed later, fifty-fifty though she says she knows sex activity isn't evil and it is something normal, performance mammals practise.

Amá catches her with Olga's skimpy underwear and thinks they vest to Julia. Julia's counselor asks if she and her mother ever talked about sex. Julia replies that her mother's comments indicate sex is the near evil thing unmarried people can do. The counselor assures Julia that sex is a normal function of the human feel and that information technology's unfortunate so many people adhere shame to it.

Julia describes her friend Lorena every bit slutty. Julia chides her for never using a safe. When Lorena misses a period, Julia goes with her to get a pregnancy exam at a clinic. Lorena says at that place is no way she will have a infant, and she will use money she's taken from her stepfather if she needs an abortion.

Protestors accost the girls. They hold signs and tell the girls they will burn in hell for aborting a child. The girls are excited and relieved when they learn Lorena isn't significant. Lorena'due south stepfather in one case pushed her against the wall, crammed his tongue in her rima oris and rubbed his penis against her leg.

Lorena's friend Juanga is a gay teen. Julia feels a sense of relief when she attends a party with Lorena and Juanga. Everyone is either queer or trans-gender, so she doesn't have to deal with creepy, leering men. Juanga's male parent ofttimes kicks him out of the firm, and Juanga runs off with various new boyfriends. His dad calls him names, tells him he volition burn in hell and has fifty-fifty tried to perform an exorcism on him. Julia says Juanga is obsessed with all things penile. Julia applauds him for not letting his parents turn him into something he'south not.

Julia finds underwear in Olga'due south room that she refers to as strange looking, like that of a hooker, and that it looks slutty and skanky. Equally Julia hunts for information about her sister, she learns Olga was having an matter with a hubby. She also discovers Olga was pregnant when she died. Julia is given the ultrasound picture and says it feels like she'due south belongings on to a piece of her sister.

Julia learns that a teacher raped ane of her current teachers when her teacher was 17. She also finds out her mother was raped while crossing the border from United mexican states into the United States. Julia helps her mother clean the firm of a man with many statues of men and women in sexual positions.

At a school dance, Julia notes that the kids are dancing then close they are practically dry humping. She says that someone'due south going to be pregnant past the end of the dance. She compares a bald guy at a party to a scrotum. Kids at the same party are shamelessly making out, and other kids are recording it on their phones. Julia sees the mode 2 of her teachers await at each other and wonders if they're boning.

When Julia is in United mexican states, her grandmother tells her two of their cats are gay. Julia'due south Mexican cousin gossips most a man who began dressing like a adult female and became a prostitute. He got AIDS, and the cousin says people believe it was his ain fault. Julia says she tries to explicate that AIDS isn't just a gay disease, only her cousin won't listen.

Discussion Topics

Additional Comments

Female trunk: Julia frequently lies well-nigh being on her period to get out of doing things. She'southward discovered that this is particularly effective with male teachers because information technology makes them uncomfortable. Julia recalls her mother throwing her in the scalding hot shower after learning Julia hadn't bathed for v days. Amá told her that girls who don't wash their junk go infections. Julia often mentions her large boobs. She says she doesn't know why her female parent is paranoid about leaving her alone in her room, because in that location's no way she'd attempt touching herself with her mother lurking around. She thinks mayhap Amá is worried she will orchestrate an orgy or overdose on heroin. When Julia goes to visit Olga's best friend, Angie, she can see the girl's nipples through her robe. Information technology reminds her of a time she walked in on the girls and saw Angie touching Olga's breasts.

Booze and drugs: Teens, including Julia, Lorena and Juanga, frequently potable and get boozer and high at parties. Julia notes a pleasant warmth going through her body later on having a lot to drink, and she says she tin sympathize why so many people are alcoholics. Juanga is very drunk subsequently a party, but Julia gets into the machine with him since she has no other way home. Fifty-fifty Julia feels concerned about the erratic beliefs she sees in Lorena and Juanga after their drinking and drug binges. Julia's dad and uncles always get boozer when they get together.

Suicide: Julia slits her wrists. She ends up in a hospital and then an outpatient facility with other troubled teens. She is diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety and is given medication. She besides has to attend ongoing counseling. Another male child in her outpatient plan also tried to kill himself by overdosing with some of his mother's pills.

Anorexia: One of the girls in Julia's outpatient program is anorexic.

Abuse: A male child in Julia's outpatient program was whipped and beaten past his begetter. His dad even put a gun in his mouth. The boy is now in treatment for cut himself.

Abortion: Julia has no problem with abortion and goes to a clinic with Lorena. At the aforementioned fourth dimension, she notes that her sister's ultrasound shows a "possibility" and she can almost feel its heartbeat in her easily. She keeps the ultrasound picture because it makes her feel like she nevertheless has a part of Olga with her.

Music: Lorena likes to heed to music about Mexican drug traffickers who buy expensive guns and cut off each other's heads.

Feminism: The definition of womanhood is ofttimes explored. Julia rebels confronting her family'due south cultural beliefs regarding what a woman should do and exist. I example is Amá'south insistence that Julia have a quinceañera. Culturally, this means she can at present trip the light fantastic and wear heels and make-up. Julia says if this is what womanhood means, she'southward not sure she wants whatsoever part of it. Many men in the story ogle or abuse women.

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